Rebels and Rabbis

Important Update: Yesterday was an amazing victory for me. I got ahold of the guy who runs the maternity home for pregnant girls from frum homes in the mountains. Don't ask how because if I told you I'd have to kill you (just joking but you get the idea). I talked to him for about an hour, but I still don't quite understand every aspect of why he operates under such secrecy. His reasons were:

1. Safety. The sperm donors (I use that term because I can't bear to call them fathers) may be dangerous.

2. Privacy. The girls are blindfolded in the car on the way up. Of course, they are told about this before hand. They don't even tell each other their real names while in the home. The goal is to let these girls go back to their regular lives once they go home. Their parents think that they are in Israel doing chesed work. Even the phones are routed through Israel in order to maintain that facade.

3. Rabbis. Although several gedolei hador both know about and approve of this home, many lesser rabbanim would have a fit if they found out. There are two main reasons for this: a) They feel that by giving these girls a place to go the home is enabling promiscuity and b) The children these girls produce are from Niddas (women who were ritually impure at the time of conception) and therefore spiritually damaged in these Rabbis views. The fact that the babies get adopted by Jewish families, grow up without stigma and end up marrying into regular Jewish families would anger them.

Just thought I'd tell you about this all. Although I can't share too much in such a public forum, you'll definately be made aware of tidbits from future conversations. And by the way, if you ever know of someone who would consider this home as an option, please get in touch with me. My contact information can be found on my profile.

What made me think back to the whole topic of rebels in insular communities was my discovery of this two year old article: http://www.nydailynews.com/news/story/116106p-104758c.html Yup, the one about Frimcha and Elky, two girls with enough courage to leave the lifestyle that was forced down their throats. Frimchy is doing very well for herself at the moment. She's had her jobs, pays her rent, and is now in Israel. She's even considering Nivei, pending scholorship funds. Elky is in Tzofia, an institution for 'disturbed' teen girls.

It amazes me that anyone can break free from a culture that punishes questioning, condemns education and allows only minimal contact with the outside world. But Frimchy managed to, and not only that, she refused to let her upbringing ruin Judaism for her. Sure she made her mistakes and floundered around for a while before getting her bearings. But she came to the realization that just because her sect's twisted form of Judaism didn't work for her that didn't mean that it was all nonsense.

The truth is that any teen who has a brain and isn't afraid to use it will probe, question and challenge the status quo. It's a normal part of growing up. So why do the Rabbis fear it so?

Note: This post will be revised, but right now I'm too frustrated. I wrote a wonderful post that was lost when the power flickered. I tried to reproduce it, but it's just not the same. I'll work on it, though. :(